How do you give the finger? First of all, there is no one way to do it. But if you are looking for inspiration on how to give a handjob to a partner who has a vulva, you have landed on the right page. We have collected the best tips and tricks for delicious finger sex.
Fingering - and maybe even making your sex partner come - is more than just sticking your finger into the vagina and pulling it out and in. Often your partner will need to warm up first. You can do this by kissing and touching the body's many erogenous zones and maybe even wait to penetrate them with your finger until they are wet. In fact, you can give a finger without penetrating the vagina at all, but simply stick to caressing the external genitalia.
If we are going to proceed in a completely impractical and comprehensive way: It may be a good idea to proceed slowly. Maybe you start by stimulating and touching your partner outside of their clothes or outside of their panties, then you slowly move your hand down into their panties, where you stimulate the clitoris, and only after a good while with the kiss and caress do you stick a finger - or two - up the vagina. After this, it can go many ways, and it is not at all certain that it is the act of being penetrated by your finger that makes your partner come. Your handjob might as well end with stimulation of the clitoris. As I said: There is only one way to do it.
Which position is best to finger in?
Again, there is no one answer. In fact, we have put together a whole guide with sex positions that you can try out - the vast majority work for finger sex. You can lie next to each other, you can finger while lying on your knees doggystyle, you can sit between your partner's spread legs, you can do it standing in the bath, and if you both have a vulva, you can also finger each other finger at the same time. Only the imagination sets the limits.
We have put together a list that you can pick from if you are missing ideas on how to spoil your sex partner and their vulva with a delicious handjob.
11 good tips for giving the finger
- Give yourself plenty of time. If touching a vulva is new to you, take some time to explore with your hand. It may sound dry: But get your bearings - that's our best advice. If you are an experienced finger-giver, a calm start can also be a good idea if you are not super excited yet. Be gentle in the beginning, you can always increase the speed and intensity later. And pay attention to your partner's signals. How do they react? What do they like?
- Start with the clitoris . Most vulva owners need the clitoris to be stimulated during sex to come. Therefore, it is a good place to start here.
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Make the clitoris wet . You can easily finger without extra moisture, but it can feel nice for your partner when your fingers can slide easily over the sand. You can easily use saliva, but you can also choose the luxury model and use a lubricant that makes it feel extra delicious.
- Change your pace . Does it feel best for your partner when you rub your finger quickly against the clitoris? How do they react when you move your finger slowly? Try changing gears continuously and notice how your sex partner reacts - or ask them how it feels.
- Vary the pattern . Do you always move your finger in circles over the clitoris or just up and down when giving your partner a hand job? Try changing movement. For example can you make a U-motion that goes from under the opening of the vagina, up over the clitoris and down the other side of the vagina again - back and forth, back and forth. Again, it is a good idea to use moisture in the form of lubricant or saliva.
- Ask your partner to lie on his stomach . When they have their stomach against the mattress, the pressure against their bladder changes and this can make arousal feel in a whole new way. At the same time, it also gives you a completely different working angle, and you can reach other parts of your partner's abdomen. For example there is also free access to the bottom and anus from here.
- Combine your finger job with oral sex . It can both be your partner's butt being pampered with a rim job or you can lick their vulva in the meantime. If you lack inspiration, you can take a look at our two guides for oral sex: 11 brilliant tips and tricks for licking pussy andrimming: 8 tips for a good rimming job .
- Squeeze around the clitoris . You will need two hands here. Use two fingers to squeeze the glans in a tweezer grip with one hand while stimulating it with the other. It can make it all feel even more intense for your partner.
- Explore edging . Stop stimulating your partner just before you can sense that climax is near. Wait a little. And then start again. Just before they come, you stop again. Eventually, you let the orgasm overwhelm them. For some, the orgasm feels deeper, more intense and also lasts longer when they 'edge'.
- Stimulate the g-spot . There is disagreement as to whether the small point even exists, but many vulva owners experience intense pleasure from being stimulated at the so-called 'g-spot'. The point sits 2-5 cm up in the vagina, placed on the vaginal wall facing the stomach. Among other things, this is where you should stimulate if you want to give your partner a squirt orgasm. You can learn much more about this in our guide 12 simple tips: How to get a squirt orgasm .
- Remember the anus . Who says a handjob should only be reserved for your partner's vagina? It can be both naughty and delicious to be stimulated in the anus with a finger - maybe even at the same time as you also have a finger in the vagina.
What does it mean to give the finger?
To 'finger' means you use your fingers to stimulate and satisfy your partner sexually by touching and caressing their vulva in a nice, delicious and arousing way. You can both finger by stimulating your partner's clitoris and by stimulating them inside the vagina or anus. Fingering can also be called 'giving a handjob', 'hand job', 'finger sex' and 'hand sex'.
