Perhaps you have once heard the phrase "everything is a dildo if you're brave enough" a bit too fresh. And as such it's not completely wrong either... but definitely not the best or safest approach to masturbation either.
Here's a guide to ways to masturbate and things to masturbate with if your fingers and hands need a break or your sex toy has run out of power.
7 things you can use to masturbate with
It requires a fresh look at the contents of the vegetable drawer and the fixtures in the bathroom, but once you open your eyes to the possibilities, you always have a vibrator or dildo at hand! So fear not if you're on a trip far away from sex toys and sex partners - here are seven items you can use to masturbate with:
1. The electric toothbrush
Put a condom on your teeth's (and most vibrating) best friend and see what it can do to your clitoris, perineum or shaft. BzzBzzz!
2. Contents from the vegetable drawer
If you have a cucumber or carrot in the kitchen and a condom, you have the recipe for your very own homemade dildo. And you can even choose the size yourself. Feel free to add a few drops of lubricant. Get well.
3. Hand shower or faucet
Use the rays in the bath to stimulate your clitoris. Experiment with where it feels good and play with the pressure on the beam. If you have a dick, you can also use the hot rays on your crotch and balls while you masturbate. If you have a bathtub, you can also let the hot jet from the faucet run down your clitoris while you lie in the bath - depending on how your bathroom is set up, this may require a slightly acrobatic position with your legs up against the wall.
4. A pillow or quilt
Roll up your pillow or duvet and lie or sit with it between your legs. Press your clitoris against it while moving your abdomen back and forth in circles. Try varying the pressure.
5. A banana peel
Open the banana and take out the fruit itself and use the peel as a penis sleeve. The moist and smooth inside will give you a completely new sensation! Want more moist? Then add a few drops of lube or oil. You should probably not try to stick the banana itself anywhere, it will become something... moss.
6. Oil or lubricant
A completely ordinary hand job can be spiced up with a few drops of lubricant or delicious almond oil in the hand. And if you also need lubricant, read our guide on what you can use instead of lubricant .
7. A cold or warm cloth
Find the softest washcloth and wet it with hot or cold water, whichever you prefer. Wrap the cloth around your cock and enjoy the soft feeling while you masturbate.
Safety first! There are also things you should stay away from masturbating with.
4 things you must never use to masturbate with
1. Sharp objects
For example, bottles that can give you scratches and wounds. Open bottles can also create negative pressure and become stuck. Yikes!
2. Narrow objects
It might be tempting to stick the dick into openings on objects made of rubber, for example. Before doing so, make sure the item can accommodate so you don't get stuck and get injured.
3. Objects that can break or split
A thick felt-tip pen where the lid can come off or a baguette, for example. Yes, these are silly examples, but if you look around the living room, there are probably plenty of things that could actually be used for the purpose, and which you have never before considered using for masturbation. And that should probably stay with the tank as well. As soon as something can fall off or be forgotten inside you: Don't do it!
4. Dirty and damaged items
For example you should not use a carrot as a dildo if there is dirt on it - or an electric toothbrush as a vibrator if there are problems with the battery.
When using an object that is not intended for masturbation, to enter the vagina or anus and to touch the genitals, remember three things:
1. Always clean the item first
2. Put a condom on the object
3. If you use it in the anus, remember that there must be some kind of back stopper on the object. Otherwise, it can slip right up into the rectum.
Sex and masturbation are delicious, but tears, infections and cystitis are not. And you risk getting that if you don't remember to clean and ensure a clean surface with a condom.
Sex toys such as dildos and vibrators are developed in materials and surfaces that ensure that you cannot get infections and injuries when you masturbate, and therefore they will always be the best choice.
3 quick things about masturbation
1. Is it healthy to masturbate?
YES! It is super healthy - both physically and mentally. When you masturbate, it has a positive effect on e.g. sleep, mood and pain. Read the guide is it healthy to masturbate?
2. Which vibrator should I choose?
Would you like a vibrator (and get rid of the vegetable drawer hassle), and think: "Which vibrator should I choose?". So fear not - we have already made a guide for you to help you find the right model for your needs and desires. Read the guide which vibrator should I choose?
3. What is the best way to masturbate?
There is not just one answer to this - it is of course very different from person to person, what works best and feels nice. The best thing you can do is try your hand and experiment with lube, vibrators and penis sleeves. There are many ways to masturbate, and we have also made a guide for you where you can learn more about masturbation and how to masturbate: How do you masturbate best?
